What Do You Rather Wanna Be?

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Back in the good ol' days I learnt a song at school which I chirpingly sung and hummed along - The Butterfly Song. The words went like this -

If I were a butterfly, I'd thank you Lord for giving me wings
If I were a robin in a tree, I'd thank you Lord that I could sing
If I were a fish in the sea, I'd wiggle my tail and I'd giggle with glee
But I just thank you father for making me, me.

For you gave me a heart and you gave me a smile
You gave me Jesus and you made me your child
And I just thank you Father for making me, me.

If I were an elephant, I'd thank you Lord by raising my trunk
If I were a kangaroo, You know I'd hop right up to you
If I were an octopus, I'd thank you Lord for my fine looks
But I just thank you Father for making me, me.

For you gave me a heart and you gave me a smile
You gave me Jesus and you made me your child
And I just thank you Father for making me, me.

If I were a wiggly worm, I'd thank you Lord that I could squirm
If I were a fuzzy wuzzy bear, I'd thank you Lord for my fuzzy, wuzzy hair
If I were a crocodile, I'd thank you Lord for my great smile
But I just thank you Father for making me, me.

For you gave me a heart and you gave me a smile
You gave me Jesus and you made me your child
And I just thank you Father for making me, me.

Those were the days when the cares were few; fun was more and laughter was all around. Those were the days when I really loved being 'ME'. Those were the days when I meant the lyrics as I sung along!

But today, so many cares, so many worries, I wonder if God's idea of making me 'ME' was all that good! Of course, He is all powerful, all knowing, all wonderful, and all of that and I really don't mean to question His mighty creativity skills - but wait, is 'ME' a real good idea? Maybe to Him, but not much to me. I'd rather be a Bappi and swim stretching my fins in the in my small lil world called the fish-bowl with nothing to do but pout my mouth and suck in water and throw out whenever I'm a lil full. After all what do fishes do all day long?!?! Or I'd be better of a bird, singing all day and flying from tree to tree around the wide, wide world with no extra flying charges or boarding passes or seat belts or nosey passengers. And maybe even having the sadistic pleasure of shitting on all those people I've always wanted to!

Whoa! That sounds so liberating! Only if I were a bird! Then maybe I'd gladly and assertively sing - I thank you Father, for making me, ME!

Meanwhile, all my adversaries can rejoice at the idea that I ain't a bird!

Till then, lemme think of some other ways of shitting on people!

Pet-o-Mania!

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One more birthday just whizzed by! This time was different. Unlike the other ones, I bought myself a gift! No, not the boring kapdas! But I got myself a handsome pair of twins! Now before your thoughts race past the roofs, lemme tell you what I actually got myself!

Always wanted pets from a long, long time! Tired of waiting for someone to gift me; I bought myself one. No, not a cat or a birdy or a puppy; but a guppy! Yep, guppy fish! Bought two of them. And thou shalt be called Bappi and Gappi. They are two tiny fishes of the underwater fauna, nesting in a polythene bag that I got them in. I din't really plan to buy them when I set off on my journey. Loitering around the busy bazaars, I walked in a tiny aquarium bargaining and clobbering about fishes and fins and walked out with a bowl, two tiny-tots, some liquid and fish food. All for less than 200 bucks! Cheap no? What else do you expect from a eternally miserly idiot like me!?!? And then began my gestation period!

Carrying them in my shaky hands was as if I was having them in my bachha pouch! Phew! I was so damn nervous as I tugged them along the busy streets. My senses were extra alert and sensitive. Every screeching bike or a honking rick seemed a nightmare and I was worried about the trauma it would cause my babies! I guess this is what motherhood does to you! Hmmm, I did start feeling like a brooding hen; only I had fins instead of wings under me! Boarding the bus seemed another herculean for the mother of two in tow! Against all odds, I finally reached home safe home and let my babies have their first glimpse of their new world! I wonder if they were they were scared or excited. I din't hear them cry; but they were thriving with life for sure!

And now as I pen this, they are circling their small round world, round and round. A lil scared as they are as I knock their glass, I know they will learn to love mama with time. I really hope they do!

At 24, I don't really know to look after myself; I dunno how do I bring up my babies! But it's worth a try, no? At least I won't have diapers to change nor potty train!

P.S. Flashback of the journey, I now realise I walked out with a dreaming wish, but that wish remained just that - a dream. Maybe better luck next time!

Till then, lemme fish!